Friday, August 29, 2014
Monday, August 25, 2014
The funniest thing that they heard a kid say.....
6. “A kid told me, ‘We’re not supposed to touch a cat’s butt,’ then leaned close and whispered, ‘But sometimes when my momma isn’t looking I do.’”
7. “I was teaching about 9-1-1 and asked the class what you should do if you’re in a car accident. One kid answered, ‘Call William Mattar!’”
8. “When I was a wee child I was at the mall with my mom when I spotted a rather large woman ahead of us wearing a fur coat. I yelled, ‘Mommy, a bear!’”
10. “When I was little my dad told me Jesus was there with us in the room. I didn’t understand, so I asked, ‘Daddy, are you Jesus?’ He laughed and said no. Still confused, I then asked, ‘Daddy, am I Jesus?’”
11. “At the pool my little sister asked, ‘How does that rope stop the deep water from going in the shallow water?’”
14. “I used a basketball pump needle to clean weed resin out of a pipe the day before a neighbor kid asked to borrow my ball pump. As he pumped his ball he said, ‘Hey! This smells like my uncle Joe’s house!’”
16. “At the store a little kid in front of me farted really loudly. The mom said, ‘What do you say?’ and he’s like ‘THAANK YOUUUU.’”
18. “At the market my kid said, ‘Why are you buying beer, Dad? Do you know how much candy we could get with that money?!’”
19. “Our toddler threw his spoon on the floor and said, ‘I want a fuckin’ knife.’ My wife and I were shocked until we realized he was actually saying, ‘I want a fork and knife.’”
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